Bryan Fischer and the AFA put the FUN in FUNDAMENTALISM
Bryan Fischer, The AFA, and a recent timeline of Christian Fundamentalism – Sources: MediaMatters.org, TowlerRoad.com, RightWingWatch.org, Action.AFA.net, RenewAmerica.com
- Bryan Fischer: Director of Issue Analysis for Government and Public Policy at the American Family Association, an organization whose mission can best be summed up in a direct quote from their website: “We believe that God has communicated absolute truth to man through nature and the Bible, and that all men everywhere and at all times are subject to His authority. Therefore, a culture based on Biblical truth best serves the well-being of our country as evidenced by the vision of our forefathers as set forth in the Declaration of Independence.” This is an organization that actively seeks to legislate public policy that will more accurately reflect biblical authority.
- Nov. 6, 2009 – In response to the murders at Fort Hood, Fischer writes that Muslims should be barred from military service. “The barbarians are no longer at the gate. They’re inside the fort, and it’s time for the insanity to stop.”
- Dec. 14, 2009 – Fischer claims in an AFA blog post that Article IV of the Constitution indicating that no “religious test” be required for service in a public office simply means that it doesn’t matter which denomination of Christianity that you belong to.
- Jan. 8, 2010 – Fischer openly advocates the use of “lethal force” against Muslims, alluding to the biblical genocide of the Canaanites in a blog post entitles “Islam is an Evil, Wicked religion – Here’s Proof”. “You can begin to understand why God instructed the Israelites to kill every living thing among the Canaanites – every man, every woman, and every child. To leave even one alive was to put innocent Israelites in future jeopardy.”
- April 9, 2010 – Fischer writes that the best way to “save what is left of American culture” is to deport all Muslims currently living in the US and halt the immigration of Muslims across US borders. It is worth noting that this is the first blog post that comes with a disclaimer at the top that reads: “The American Family Association has not taken a position on this issue.” Fischer is employed by the AFA, he represents the AFA at conferences, he’s practically the voice of the AFA.
- April 12, 2010 – Fischer backpedals, sort of. He thinks we should only deport Muslims who refuse to accept Jesus as their personal lord and savior. “Those who are willing to convert to Christianity and renounce Islam, Allah, Mohammed and the Koran may be welcomed, for they can become not just good Christians but true Americans.”
- April 15, 2010 – Fischer and the AFA argue that it would be impossible for a gay judge to rule impartially in court when “homosexual causes” are involved. Y’know, just like how it would be impossible for a black judge or a lady judge to remain impartial when their respective minority groups are represented in court. “A homosexual judge cannot help but give the home-field advantage to every legal team appearing before him who represents homosexual causes. It will be impossible for the visiting team, the team representing sexual normalcy and natural marriage, to get a fair shake in his courtroom.”
- April 23, 2010 – Fischer, in a blog critisizing the military for disinviting Franklin Graham from a Pentagon ceremony celebrating the National Day of Prayer, claims that the military is run by “Fundamentalist Muslims and homosexual advocates”. Fischer says Muslim extremists and gay people are working together harmoniously to destroy American family values via the US military. Riiiiight.
- May 24, 2010 – What would Jesus sign? According to Fischer, the Arizona Immigration law. Why? “Because of his compassion. This compassion is for the citizens of Arizona who are subject to home invasions, out-of-control drug trafficking, human smuggling, the constant threat of kidnappings, and a $2.7 billion price tag for all the social problems caused by illegal aliens. The costs of education, welfare, medical care and law enforcement may wind up bankrupting the state. The compassion of Jesus goes out to Arizonans who live with constant social disruption and suffer a steady drain on resources which should be available to take care of their families.”
- May 26, 2010 – Fischer’s hot mess of crazy reaches critical mass: Hitler was gay, the Nazi party began in a gay bar in Munich, and the worst of the atrocities were committed by gay Nazis. “Most of Hitler’s closest aides were homosexuals or sexual deviants. This circle included not only Roehm but the Hitler Youth leader, the Minister of Justice, the Minister of Economics, Hermann Goering (who may not have been homosexual but who liked to dress in drag, paint his nails and put rouge on his cheeks), his personal attorney and his bodyguards. Hitler himself likely functioned as a male prostitute in the days of his youth in Vienna.”
The AFA (supposedly a 501c3 nonprofit and the organization that employs Bryan Fischer) owns and operates nearly 200 radio stations across the country. On it’s website, the AFA states that it “used its formidable internet presence to promote Tax Day (April 15) Tea Party Rallies in over 1,000 cities across America.”
the snow will continue until morale improves
My grandparents live in a nice neighborhood. The street signs are all a matching shade of hunter green and the names of the streets are in a respectable sans-serif font. The neighborhood association to which they pay dues has very strict mandates with regard to parking (only blemish-free late model vehicles in an inconspicuous color – try beige – are to be parked on the street) dog walking (allow only the most attractive members of your household to walk your AKC registered canine – please leave cousin Wall Eye Robert and aunt Unibrow Betsey in the basement where they belong) and Christmas decorations (small tidy LIVE wreaths no more than 24″ in diameter and made exclusively of either juniper pepperberry OR cedar with a red ribbon in either silk OR satin only please, on pain of death).
You’d think that with all of these regulations and expensive membership dues, the neighborhood association of the subdivision of Ye Olde WASP’s Nest would have enough money and enough good sense to get its quaint little streets thoroughly plowed when 14″ of snow blanketed most of the area.
I spent the first night of “Snow Blows 2009” at the home of a friend who lives out in a rural community where in the event of a snow storm packs of good ol’ boys on four wheelers patrol the neighborhood with chain-saws looking for downed trees to obliterate and ordinary citizens attach giant scrapey things to the grills of their trucks and get their plow on at 6am. Needless to say, the roads were pretty much clear by about 7:45 and people were making their way to the Walmart for the paper and some hot coffee.
By the time I left in the early afternoon I figured my grandparents pretentious little village would have their snow situation under control too. They didn’t, not in the least little bit. When I pulled into the entrance I was greeted by a wall of gray snow and the sound of my own spinning tires. Apparently no one had come or gone in the past 18 hours and certainly no one had bothered to line up some sort of snow-be-gone service a few days ago when the Weather Channel announced a winter weather apocalypse.
Much to the chagrin of our neighbors, I had to park my big white truck – complete with dents and leftover decals from its stint as a work vehicle for a machine shop – on the street because the snow was so thick that I couldn’t make it up to the cul-de-sac let alone the driveway.
The next day was the same story. The rest of the town is back to business despite the weather, but residents of my grandparents creepy little Stepford subdivision seem completely lost. Driveways remain uncleared, cars remain safely nestled in their garages. Don’t any of these people have enterprising grandkids with snow shovels and thermoses of hot cocoa?
My grandfather did end up paying me and Kyle to shovel snow from his driveway. No on else seemed particularly interested in utilizing our services.
I think these people might be crazy.
Later
Morgan
Bowl of Popcorn 